


Fools

by authenticmakki



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Music, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Inspired by Music, M/M, Seijoh is a music industry, Slow Burn, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-11
Updated: 2020-09-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:54:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26413738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/authenticmakki/pseuds/authenticmakki
Summary: Only fools fall for you,Only fools do what I do
Relationships: Hanamaki Takahiro/Matsukawa Issei, Kindaichi Yuutarou/Kunimi Akira
Comments: 2
Kudos: 18





	Fools

**Author's Note:**

> The songs I based my fic off of were
> 
> I can't make you love me- Dave Thomas Junior  
> This is a cover but I used this version as reference
> 
> Fools- Troye Sivan  
> It's my favourite song at the moment and I really enjoy basing my stories off of songs
> 
> Lost in You- Khai Dreams  
> It was just referenced for a brief moment but still was part of the inspiration

Brown eyes surveyed the piano carefully. No good ideas came to mind. Kunimi struggled to come up with a good melody for a song he was working on. With a groan, Kunimi leaned back in his seat until his upper half was upside down. The music room was quiet since it was way passed the time he was supposed to leave. Kunimi was never one to do more work than required, if anything he did less work than what was asked. This time however, he had motivation to complete this song. 

The sound of the music room door clicking caught his attention. Kindaichi swung the door open and carried a tray of coffee with him. Kindaichi looked at Kunimi for a moment before walking over to him.

“Hey, w-why are you upside down like that? You’ll get a nosebleed if you stay like that for too long.” Kindaichi called out.

“It helps me think.” Kunimi grumbled.

Kindaichi pat Kunimi’s stomach to get him to get up. Reluctantly, Kunimi rose from his bent position and sat up to look at Kindaichi with an annoyed expression. Kindaichi smiled warmly in response to Kunimi’s scowl and handed him a coffee.

Kunimi rarely composed songs with words but Kindaichi was insistent on the two of them making a song they could sing together. From grade school all the way to college the two of them would make songs together. Each part of the song was made by both of them. Kunimi never liked the spotlight so he was never the vocalist. Luckily, he had someone who wasn’t afraid of being the center of attention. When Kindaichi made a song there were always lyrics to which he sang. Kunimi never made songs where he would sing, just instrumental pieces.

“Maybe we could switch jobs you know? Like maybe I could come up with a melody and beat then you could try lyric writing.” Kindaichi suggested.

Kunimi pondered for a moment before answering, “You do realize I haven’t actually done that before right?”

“Well yeah I’m aware of that but maybe you could try for once. You’re an expressive person..sorta...but just try, we could get some progress trying something new!”

With a sigh Kunimi sipped his coffee. He could try making the words to the song but he was really afraid. For some reason expressing yourself through words always scared, or more like irritated Kunimi. People don’t realize just how much emotion gets spilled on to the pages when you start writing songs. Despite him only composing pieces with no words, a lot of his emotions gets released through every note. He never liked feeling vulnerable which was why he never wrote words to his songs. He would rather the listener interpret his pieces however they want so they wouldn’t have to know how he felt while composing the song.

Kunimi had feelings like every normal human on the earth and he resented it. Everything about feelings sucked. Well almost everything. Kunimi was never the type to actively search or indulge in the romantic fantasies others would be into. The idea of falling in love disgusted Kunimi with every ounce of his being. He himself never thought he could fall in love with anyone for the longest time but Kindaichi was there to prove that idea wrong.

It was a small crush, although Kunimi never liked to admit it to himself that he had fallen for his friend. To him it wasn’t a crush, it was a strong adoration. Kunimi always preferred to be alone but Kindaichi’s presence was always comforting to him. 

Kunimi scooched over in the piano seat and looked at Kindaichi expectantly. Kindaichi sat down and handed Kunimi his notebook. The brunette opened it and flipped to the pages full of scribbles and doodles on it. Both their heads were empty. 

Kunimi picked up a pen from the top of the piano and added on to the various scribbles on the notebook. As much as he hated speaking from the heart, the smaller male decided that it was his only way of actually making any progress. 

Before writing, Kunimi glanced at Kindaichi who was tapping his chin with his left hand while pressing different notes with his right hand. It didn’t take long for the taller of the two to notice Kunimi looking his way. He shot a smirk at Kunimi which made him give a disgusted face in return. This made Kindaichi laugh before his attention fell on to the piano once again.

A very faint blush appeared on Kunimi’s cheeks as he began to draw little hearts on the page. Without thinking, Kunimi wrote down the word “fools”. It was a word that could be applied to many things which was something that could make a song open ended and up for interpretation just like in his own personal pieces.

“Hey I think I have something..”Kunimi mumbled and tugged on Kindaichi’s shirt sleeve.

Kindaichi looked over at the notebook and where he had written the word down. He paused for a moment thinking about the context of the word. Kindaichi’s eyes wandered over the page and spotted the hearts. This made him think of a love song.

“We’re making a heartbroken song?” He asked innocently.

“I was going for a more up to the listener feel for the song but I suppose it’s easier to write sad songs.” Kunimi replied.

“The hearts were making me think.” Kindaichi pointed to the hearts that were carefully drawn in a cluster near the margin.

“T-those were to help me think.” Kunimi pouted and smacked his hand away from him.

“Everyone loves a good sad love song so we can use that!” Kindaichi smiled, “I haven’t found a good melody yet.”

“Let’s figure that out tomorrow I’m tired.” Kunimi yawned and rested his head on Kindaichi’s shoulder.

Kindaichi nodded and got up from the seat. He shut the piano and gathered his things into his shoulder bag and waited for Kunimi at the doorway. 

Kunimi dragged himself off the chair and did the same as Kindaichi. The two exited the room and began their walk home.

“Since we have a base for the song I think the beat and melody are gonna be easier to find don’t you think?” Kindaichi asked before sipping his drink.

“I guess so. It’s gonna sound sad right so you have that to think about too.” Kunimi said.

For the most part Kunimi was silent. This wasn’t a rare occurrence though since Kunimi wasn’t much of a talker. Kindaichi would always be the one talking. He could go on for hours about his day and random topics, it was endearing.

Kunimi wondered how he got stuck with someone like Kindaichi. Maybe it was fate, maybe it was misfortune, regardless of what brought them together, Kunimi was content with him. He wasn’t smiling on the outside but he was on the inside while he listened to Kindaichi ramble about Oikawa’s music and things he wanted to add to the song they were making. 

Kindaichi was always someone who seeked approval from others. He especially looked for validation from people he admired like the upperclassmen from Seijoh’s music industry. They were older and far more experienced in music than he was and he was completely aware of their skills. They taught Kindaichi when he first joined Seijoh, they did the same with Kunimi but he was never that attached to them like Kindaichi was. 

Kindaichi worked hard to get where he was and Kunimi admired him for that. It almost made Kunimi want to work harder, almost.

Kunimi watched Kindaichi go off on some ramble about how the people at the coffee shop got his order wrong. He seemed so heated, it was cute. Kunimi studied the way Kindaichi raised his voice angrily as he continued to rant about the horrible staff. It was amusing to watch Kindaichi get furious over one small thing.

“I’m gonna politely rate them one star!” Kindaichi exclaimed with a devious expression.

“That’s not the most evil thing you could do. You could always burn down their store.” Kunimi deadpanned.

“Wha-hey that’s too much.”

“I mean you seem pretty mad about your order so why not use that anger to take revenge evilly?”

Kindaichi shook his head at Kunimi and took out his phone. He spent a few moments scrolling and typing until he stopped walking and shoved the screen in Kunimi’s face.

“HAHA LOOK!” Kindaichi shouted proudly.

Kunimi looked at Kindaichi with a bored expression and examined the screen. He pushed the screen with his nose lazily.

“Now you gave them 2 whole stars.” Kunimi frowned and continued walking ahead.

“Hey wait that wasn’t the plan, agh whatever.” Kindaichi sighed in defeat.

The walk continued silently before they finally reached Kindaichi’s house. He still lived with his siblings but his parents moved to an elderly home half a year ago. Kindaichi walked up the steps and waved at Kunimi happily.

“See ya tomorrow! Get some rest okay?” 

“What else did you think I was gonna do when I got home?”

Kindaichi shrugged and unlocked his door waving at Kunimi one last time before entering. Kunimi stayed on the sidewalk and waited for him to fully leave his sight before heading to his own place. 

Kunimi didn’t realize this before but he really enjoyed the silly little moments with Kindaichi. They were meaningless moments that they would forget in a few years but they still brought joy to Kunimi when he thought about them. He looked back behind him, scanning the familiar scenery. The two often walked down this street together, from when they were kids until now. 

Kindaichi’s house was a safe space for Kunimi whenever his parents would fight. Kunimi would run all the way to Kindaichi so he didn’t have to hear the yelling. This was why Kunimi stopped putting effort into things. He thought despite being dedicated to something that there was always potential for it to crumble. Why put effort into something that might someday disappear, like a marriage. What’s the point of anything at all? 

Kunimi frowned thinking back on all the dark memories of the past. These were things he would rather not think about. They were memories he wanted to stay silent about until he died. However, throughout all the hardships Kunimi went through, Kindaichi remained his pillar.

He was always there for Kunimi and he never ran away. Kindaichi protected Kunimi from anything that might hurt him. That was the comfort he never got from his family.

Back when they were little Kunimi always got yelled at for putting little to no effort into things. They were in kindergarten and their class was playing tag. Kunimi was almost always it because he wouldn’t run and nobody liked it because when he was supposed to catch people he didn’t even run after anyone. This caused Kindaichi to run with Kunimi and tell him to high five him so he didn’t have to be it anymore.

Kunimi never really relied on Kindaichi but he did find reassurance knowing he had someone supporting him. Kunimi did his best to be there for Kindaichi. His way of being there for him was mainly just blunt remarks to an obvious problem that Kindaichi was overthinking and just reality checks all around.

He finally reached his apartment and unlocked the door and headed inside. Kunimi bought an apartment around the area he grew up in since it was a familiar area and he didn’t feel like getting to know a new area. The apartment was a few blocks away from his former neighbourhood so he could get away from his parents. Kunimi flipped on the lights and looked around his home. It was eerily quiet in his house which didn’t sit well with Kunimi. Without any more thought, Kunimi took his shoes off and headed to his room. He placed his bag on the floor and threw his coffee cup away. He flopped onto his bed and lay there for a few minutes before rolling on to his back.

He sighed deeply and looked at the time from his phone. “11:36” it read. Kunimi got up to get dressed. Kunimi slipped on an oversized black shirt and some grey shorts. Now on the bed again Kunimi leaned against the headboard and scrolled through his phone. It was slightly earlier than Kunimi’s usual bedtime so he decided to occupy himself before sleeping.

Kunimi saw 90 day fiance memes pop up on his instagram feed which annoyed him but intrigued him at the same time. He wondered how stupid you had to be to think you’ve fallen in love with someone who just wanted your money. Only the dumbest idiot would miss that obvious trait in a person especially when they made it clear they just wanted your bank account.

“Only idiots would fall for people like you...wait.” It was like a light bulb lit up in Kunimi’s head as he said that to himself. Immediately, Kunimi shot up and headed over to his bag. He pulled out the song notebook and placed it on his desk. Kunimi opened it to a new page and began to write.

“Fools..only fools would fall for people like you.” He whispered. 

He ended up scribbling that line and rewriting it as he didn’t quite vibe with the flow of the words.

“Only fools fall for you..” Kunimi said once more. Satisfied with what he came up with, Kunimi decided to reward himself with sleep. Once more he flopped onto the bed and wrapped himself into a cocoon with his blanket and immediately fell asleep.

Kunimi awoke with a burning urge to continue writing. He felt content with the fact that he managed to write a line for the song and he wanted to keep up his progress. Kunimi rubbed his eyes and yawned. Getting out of bed was always a struggle since Kunimi was definitely not a morning person. He scowled as he lifted his blanket and wrapped it around his shoulders and sat at his desk once more.

“This would be so much easier if Kindaichi gave me a melody to write to.” Kunimi mumbled and stared at the page he had written on last night. Kunimi picked up his phone and started looking at random sad posts for inspiration. Reading different heartbroken twitter reposts made him cringe but that was the only thing he could think of that was sad.

Kunimi was supposed to meet up with Kindaichi at the music studio again later which slightly excited him. He assumed Kindaichi probably didn’t have his part done yet because if he did come up with something he would’ve called him. 

Kunimi opened up youtube and played love songs. He found it easier to find the opposite feeling of the songs rather than finding inspiration from other sad songs. 

Kunimi shut his eyes and began humming along to “Lost in You” and started daydreaming. 

_They were standing next to each other._

_He was holding Kunimi close to his chest._

_Kunimi looked behind him to see a beautiful little house on a hill._

_His eyes wandered to the sky. It was clear._

_He felt something brush past him which made him flinch._

_“Haha Akira don’t be shocked that’s just our cat.”_

_He said his first name for once._

_“Y-Yuutaro?”_

_“I thought after 5 years of being together you’d be comfortable with saying my first name.”_

_Kunimi shook his head at his lover._

_“Our cat doesn’t have a nametag..”_

_“Well she’s actually a stray and we haven’t come up with a name for her yet. That’s kinda the reason we’re outside to look for inspiration for her name.”_

_His smile was so warm._

_Kunimi glanced around the area._

_They were slightly secluded and near some woods._

_This was how Kunimi wanted it to be._

_Alone with him._

_Kindaichi bent down and pressed a kiss to Kunimi’s temple abruptly._

_Kunimi felt his face burn up in embarrassment._

_“W-what the hell was that for?”_

_“You look cute when you’re lost in thought.”_

_Kunimi smiled genuinely, something that was rare for him but Kindaichi made that smile appear many times before._

Kunimi’s eyes shot open immediately. He caught himself daydreaming for far too long. The fantasy Kunimi thought up scared him. He never realized it, but his lips slightly curled into a smile as a big red blush covered Kunimi’s cheeks. His heart fluttered in his chest remembering the feeling of home with Kindaichi. That dream was what he considered a picture perfect future. 

Kunimi’s heart sank as he knew imagining a future with someone you ‘strongly admire’ could only mean one thing. It was the one thing Kunimi prayed he would never have to accept. Kunimi had fallen in love with his best friend.

It felt like Kunimi’s whole world was a lie. He had always tricked himself into thinking he didn’t love him but somewhere in his subconscious, he knew he had already fallen hard for him. The notion of him being in love with Kindaichi made his stomach hurt. He prayed that this was just a phase he was going through and that these feelings would fade away someday, but Kunimi had witnessed enough idiots falling in love and he watched enough dramas to know that feelings stick for a long time.

Kunimi stuck his tongue out and shook his head. He couldn’t possibly be in love with Kindaichi. Why would he ever? Maybe he only thought of him in the daydream because they were working on the song together.

Kunimi’s phone began buzzing loudly. It was an incoming call from none other than Kindaichi. Kunimi swallowed hard before tapping on the accept button.

“What?” Kunimi said, more harshly than he wanted to sound.

“Woah relax Kunimi, anyways I wanted to tell you I have a beat but the melody and rhythm are still in the works. If we could meet up soon you could help me figure it out.” Kindaichi replied. Kunimi could tell he was excited and he felt annoyed already.

“Yeah sure. I also have something for the song, it’s only one line but I have a few ideas for the rest of it.”Kunimi lifted the notebook closer to his face and read the written line in his head.

“Oh that’s still pretty good! Let’s meet up in the afternoon so we can get lunch together!” Kindaichi was radiating such happy sunshine vibes from his end of the call and it was pissing Kunimi off.

“Sounds good, I’ll see you then.”

“Ye-..huh?” Before Kindaichi could say goodbye back, Kunimi had already ended the call. 

Kunimi on the other end of the call felt his heart skip a beat after talking with Kindaichi. He pulled his blanket over his head and kicked his legs angrily. 

“I AM NOT IN LOVE WITH HIM!!” He shouted into the blanket.

He lifted the blanket off his head and frowned. Kunimi got out of his chair and headed into the bathroom. He looked at his reflection in disgust after seeing how red his cheeks became and how disheveled he looked.

Kunimi started the shower and tested the water’s temperature before entering. Yet again, Kunimi found himself in the same daydream. A part of him longed to be with Kindaichi like that but another wanted nothing more than to get rid of the budding feelings he was experiencing. 

Once Kunimi got out of the shower he looked at himself once more. He felt his stomach twisting the more he became aware of his feelings for Kindaichi. 

Kunimi went back to his bedroom to get dressed. He decided on a plain blue crewneck and black ripped jeans. He tucked in his sweater and called Kindaichi. Kunimi smiled at his contact photo. It was of him and Kindaichi holding plushies they won at a claw machine together. The happy memory flowing back to Kunimi made him feel all warm and fuzzy. 

“Heyo.” Kindaichi greeted, “Did you need something?”

“No I was just gonna tell you I was going to the studio early.” Kunimi replied.

“Oh alright I’ll be there soon then okay?”

“Yeah okay.”

“By the way..”

“Hm?”

“Where did ya wanna eat?”

“Somewhere close I don’t wanna walk.”

“I knew you’d say that.”

“Bleh whatever.”

“Alright I’ll see you then.”

“Yeah.” Kunimi ended the call.

A sigh escaped Kunimi’s mouth as he began to pack up his things. He wanted to make sure to get to the studio before Kindaichi got there so he could emotionally prepare himself. Kunimi picked his bag up and left his apartment. 

A gurgle from his stomach echoed around the hall and startled him. 

“I probably should’ve eaten breakfast..” Kunimi groaned now regretting waking up later than usual. 

It was around 11am when Kunimi finally got out of the apartment complex. He walked out and breathed in the fresh air. It was peaceful for a while before Kunimi was suddenly smacked in the face by a leaf. Kunimi looked around and noticed that the summer leaves were finally turning orange and yellow. 

Kunimi began his walk to the studio. He passed by Kindaichi’s house and was tempted to knock however he decided against it since he probably wouldn’t be ready to see his crush.

Kunimi sat on the bus and stared out the window. He was hoping something would spark inspiration in him. Nothing in particular caught his eye. Except for some reason this one house interested him. The bus had come to a stop to allow people to board and the bus stop was conveniently in front of the house Kunimi was examining. 

There was a family outside in the front yard. The mother was sitting on the porch and watched her husband play with their two sons with airplanes. Kunimi had always hated the idea of having kids. They were tiny, crying, pooping, nasty creatures and Kunimi hated them especially if they were his responsibility. Though, looking at the family Kunimi thought to himself “Maybe with him I could tolerate kids.”

Kunimi pressed the back of his hand to his lips feeling blood rush to his face. He was way too young to be thinking about that. He never even knew he could ever want to have kids but when he saw the happy family spending time together, he longed for something like that. 

He didn’t get that kind of attention from his family. His parents were strict with him and they hated each other. In the Kunimi household, you could barely feel the love a normal family would have for each other. They weren’t a happy family at all. 

The bus began moving and the happy family disappeared. Even if Kunimi was 21, he still wished he had a family so he could let his children experience the love he couldn’t feel when he was younger.

After a little while and various wars in Kunimi’s mind about domestic life, he finally arrived at the studio. The bus stop was in front of the building which Kunimi was very thankful for. He headed inside and waited for an elevator.

Once the metal doors opened they revealed two familiar faces. Kunimi headed inside and braced himself for small talk.

“Hey Kunimi.” Hanamaki smiled and casually threw up a peace sign.

Matsukawa stood next to him and simply smiled his way.

“Hey..”Kunimi said back and leaned against the railings.

Kunimi was silent throughout the elevator trip. He looked over at the duo as they conversed. There was something about the way Hanamaki looked at Matsukawa that struck Kunimi. It was almost like there was this sparkle in his upper classman’s eyes when Matsukawa would talk. 

Again, Kunimi was reminded of sprouting love. He knew he couldn’t confirm if Hanamaki actually did have feelings for Matsukawa but the way he looked at him just made it seem like he was in love with the curly haired male.

The elevator dinged signalling that Kunimi was at his floor. He gave a small bow to his fellow musicians and exited. Kunimi pulled the keys out of his pocket and unlocked the music room door. 

His eyes peered around the room to see if he was alone. With a sigh of relief, Kunimi sat at the piano and placed his bag underneath it. 

He had no idea why but he threw his head into his hands and whimpered. It was like all his emotions finally filled his bottle to the brim and he was about to explode. It was all so confusing to Kunimi.

He didn’t want to be in love but at the same time he liked feeling this bliss whenever he thought of Kindaichi. It hurt to go after something he wasn’t guaranteed to have in the end but at the same time he liked the thrill of the chase. 

Kunimi crossed his arms on the piano and rested his head in his forearms. He let out a groan and lifted his head. Kunimi frowned and turned his head to look at the window. The sky was cloudy today. Perfect for sad song writing. 

He pulled the notebook out of his bag and stared at the page. Nothing came to mind yet. Kunimi thought about the family he saw earlier. He remembered that daydream too. His ideal future with the one person he wanted to be with. 

“How the hell do I put that into words?” Kunimi scratched his head in frustration.

“Put what into words?” A voice chimed in.

Kunimi looked at the door and saw Kindaichi enter the room. His eyes lingered on Kindaichi’s figure for a bit. The butterflies began to fill Kunimi’s stomach as the daydream flashed in his mind. Kindaichi tilted his head in confusion as to why Kunimi was staring at him.

“Uh Kunimi? You good?” Kindaichi asked.

“F-fine!” Kunimi shouted embarrassed.

Kindaichi was now even more confused. He’s never seen Kunimi this jumpy before, besides that one time the chicken pox was going around in high school.

“Alright? Well I got something for the song. My friend actually helped with it.” 

Kunimi looked up at Kindaichi with a curious expression. “I didn’t know you had friends outside of Seijoh.” Kunimi teased.

“Oi shut up, I have plenty of friends outside of Seijoh you just haven’t met them!” Kindaichi blushed.

“Right right, let’s hear what you have so far then.”

Kindaichi pulled out two pairs of headphones out of his bag along with his laptop. He connected an adaptor and plugged the headphone jacks into it.

He continuously tapped away at the laptop until he finally opened the application. Eagerly, Kindaichi began playing the beat and melody for the song. 

Once it finished Kindaichi turned to Kunimi and smiled at him anxiously.

“It’s nice.” Kunimi said plainly.

“It’s nice? That’s it?!” Kindaichi’s smile faded away into a pout.

“What? It is nice.”

“I don’t know why I expected a bigger reaction from you.”

Kunimi chuckled softly, “Idiot.”

“Well let’s see what you have then.”

Kunimi opened the notebook to the page with only one line. He pointed at it and waited for Kindaichi to finish reading it.

“It’s nice.” Kindaichi mocked.

“Oh shut up. Your audio wasn’t polished but I never said anything.”

“You just did!”

Kunimi stuck his tongue out at Kindaichi and shut the notebook. 

“I had this thought for another part of the song but I’m having trouble putting it in the song. Thinking of this ideal perfect future with your partner but not being able to have it.”

Kindaichi held his chin with his index finger and thumb as he thought. “Is there anything specifically in that perfect future?”

“Um well, I was thinking the two of you standing in front of your house on the hill deciding on names for your cat or child, it doesn’t matter.”

“Hmm anything else?”

“Well I don’t know. What do you want in your perfect future?”

“I want to be with someone I love a lot, maybe I could be a dad and play with my kids, oh and we have a swimming pool in the backyard!”

“Lame.”

“Hey you’re the one who asked for my ideas!”

“Yeah whatever.”

The day continued on in banter and hard work on the song. Throughout the countless hours of them working together, Kunimi found himself glancing at Kindaichi far too much. He couldn’t help it. Seeing him so focused was cute and it motivated Kunimi.

After what seemed like forever they managed to fix up the musical part. The lyrics haven’t progressed much but there were more lines written than before.

Kindaichi slid his headphones off his head and looked at Kunimi tiredly. Kunimi returned the look and nodded. They both wordlessly agreed to take a break. 

“Eat. I need sustenance.” Kindaichi whined.

“Yeah me too.” 

“There’s a ramen place nearby we could go there if you wanna.”

“I’m down, let’s go.”

Kunimi stood up off the piano chair and helped Kindaichi off of the floor. They left everything in the music room and left. The two moved quite swiftly out of the building. They were extremely hungry and wanted to satisfy their appetites immediately.

They marched down the street and stopped at the crosswalk. Kunimi took a step too close to the edge of the sidewalk much to Kindaichi’s discomfort. Kunimi felt a strong tug on the back of his sweater and stumbled backwards.

“The hell?”

“You might get hit if you stand too close to the street.”

“Yeah well I’m hungry.”

“You would’ve died hungry then.”

“I-”

Before Kunimi could continue the argument, the walking sign appeared. They continued their journey to the ramen place. 

After about 10 minutes of walking they arrived at the restaurant. Fervently, the duo headed inside.

The waitress smiled their way, “Table for two?”

In unison, the pair nodded quickly. They were then ushered to a table in the middle of the restaurant. Almost instantly, they both took their seats and opened up the menus. Their eyes viewed the pages for a short while. They were silent as they made their decisions.

Suddenly a waiter walked over to their table and held out a small notepad and pen. “Can I get you started with anything?”

“Cold soba please.” Kunimi requested timidly.

The waiter scribbled down the order then turned to Kindaichi.

“And for you?” 

“Tonkotsu ramen.”

The waiter nodded and wrote in the notepad once more before taking the menus and leaving. 

Kunimi and Kindaichi sat next to each other instead of one of them taking the chair across from them. The two sat restlessly in their seats awaiting their meals. 

“Man my stomach hurts.” Kunimi grumbled.

“You skipped breakfast so that’s your fault. I actually ate a healthy meal before going to the studio so I don’t feel sick.” Kindaichi stated proudly. 

Kunimi grimaced at him and turned away. After several agonizing minutes their food finally arrived. The plates were placed in front of the two males as well as two cups and a pitcher of water.

As soon as the waiter turned his back, the pair said their thanks and began eating. Kunimi glanced over at Kindaichi scarfing down noodles and smiled lightly. 

“Gimme.” Kunimi said, picking up a few noodles from Kindaichi’s bowl and putting them in his mouth.

“Not fair.” Kindaichi pouted and took some of Kunimi’s noodles. He dipped them in the broth and ate them happily.

It didn’t take long for them to finish their meals and leave them full. They decided to stay for a little bit before leaving just to help digest.

“That was good.” Kindaichi said drowsily.

“I agree, this is a pretty good spot to eat. How’d you find this place anyway?”

“Me and my friend Hana went here while we were making the music.”

“Who’s he?” Kunimi said before sipping his water.

“Not a he, they’re actually a girl. And she’s a music producer. I met her a while ago but we just recently started talking more. Hana is actually really talented in composing music, you should listen to her work.”

A scowl found its way onto Kunimi’s lips as Kindaichi complimented Hana. Though he wasn’t aware of it, Kunimi was getting jealous. He was a pretty good music composer and he wanted compliments from Kindaichi too.

“You’re pretty talented too so stop pouting like that.” Kindaichi laughed, seeing Kunimi’s face.

“Thank you.” Kunimi huffed and crossed his arms.

“Let’s get the bill now.” Kindaichi raised his hand to call for a waiter and waited for one to come.

Once someone came, Kindaichi asked for the bill and sent the waiter off. His eyes trailed after him before he felt an unknown weight grab his arm. Kindaichi looked down at Kunimi who was hugging his arm and batting his eyes at him.

“No I’m not paying for you.” Kindaichi face palmed.

“Aww I thought that was gonna work.” Kunimi moped.

A small black tray was placed in front of them with their receipt on top of it. Kunimi made puppy eyes one last time which earned him a wince from Kindaichi as he placed down his money. Annoyedly, Kunimi placed down his share of the bill and waited for the waiter to take it away.

Kindaichi and Kunimi got out of the seat and stretched. They started towards the exit and made their way outside.

Kunimi felt the wind brush against his face. He narrowed his eyes to the wind then turned to Kindaichi. “It’s almost fall.”

“Yeah I know. Which means we should try and finish this song before winter time at least.”

“I agree, so we don’t have to travel all the way to the studio in the cold.”

“Also because I wanted to perform this song for this autumn festival.”

Kunimi was about to make another scowl before Kindaichi waved his hands at Kunimi, “Before you become disgusted with that idea, I will sing and you play the piano so you can hide from the crowd.”

“How big is the crowd?”

“Probably not as big as you think. The festival is happening outside of the city and they requested for Seijoh to perform meaning we have to be a part of the act.”

“Ugh.”

Kunimi leaned against Kindaichi lazily. Kindaichi patted his head in response.

“You’ll do fine Kunimi so relax.”

Kunimi sighed as they continued their walk back. Kindaichi was rambling again. He was talking about the festival and how they could do stuff together after their performance. They could take pretty pictures with the leaves, try the different food, and just enjoy the scenery.

Kunimi found himself smiling and blushing thinking about how it was basically a date like scenario. He got so lost in Kindaichi’s excitement that he nearly stopped listening to what he was saying. 

“And I could invite Hana to come watch.”

“Huh?”

“Hana? The girl who helped me with the instrumental part of the song. I think she should be there for our first official performance of the song she helped make.”

Kunimi felt himself grow irritated by the idea. He wanted it to just be him and Kindaichi. It never occurred to Kunimi just how attached he was to Kindaichi until you threw another person into their duo. 

Kindaichi looked at Kunimi expecting some bitter response but he didn’t get one. As much as Kunimi despised the idea of a third party joining them, if it would make Kindaichi happy then he’d let it happen. After all, why should he be jealous, they aren’t even together. 

“Do what you want.”

Soon after Kindaichi got the okay from Kunimi, he pulled out his phone and called Hana. He seemed excited to talk to her about this. When she didn’t pick up his attitude completely changed. Kindaichi seemed all gloomy. 

They finally made it back to the studio but they were unsure of whether to stay and continue working or not. 

“Is it me or do I really not wanna work right now?”Kindaichi pondered.

“You’re not the only one.” Kunimi answered.

“You wanna come over and watch movies?” 

“Sure.”

This was something that happened often. Movie nights after a long day at work. It was 6pm which wasn’t really night but it was close enough. They gathered their things and began discussing different movies to watch.

The two got to Kindaichi’s house and hurried in. Kindaichi noticed some unfamiliar shoes at the door but paid no mind to them.

Kindaichi put his hand to his mouth and called out, “Hey I’m home.” There was no answer. “Hey Kunimi, you can sit down on the couch and I'm gonna look for my sister.”

Kunimi obliged and removed his shoes and placed them by the door. He dropped his bag next to the couch and curled up on the couch. He took one of the pillows and hugged it to his chest. It smelled like Kindaichi. 

Kindaichi made his way up the stairs to his sister’s room. There were some weird noises coming from inside but Kindaichi was too focused on finding his sister that he didn’t seem to fully process what those sounds were. Kindaichi peered into the room through the crack in the doorway and gagged. _‘That’s why there were random guy shoes at the door’_ he thought to himself. He immediately ran down the stairs and into the living room.

Silently Kunimi took the remote and switched on the t.v. He scrolled through the different channels, nothing really catching his eye. All of a sudden Kindaichi appeared in front of him all red and panting. 

“Can you move? I'm trying to-” Kunimi said, trying to look past him.

Kindaichi grabbed Kunimi by his shoulders and looked him dead in the eye, “We gotta go now.”

“But I was still-”

“No we’re leaving.”

Kindaichi left to put on his shoes and opened the door and gestured for Kunimi to hurry up. Kunimi got up grudgingly, shut off the t.v then grabbed his things and headed for the door. Once the two of them were ready they began walking.

“I take it, we're going to my place now.” Kunimi groaned.

“Yeah, no question.”

“I don’t even wanna know.”

“THEY WERE FUCKING!”

“I SAID I DIDN’T WANNA KNOW!”

Kunimi shivered at the thought and walked faster. Kindaichi didn’t bother keeping up with him, still traumatized by the disgusting display of passion he witnessed. 

Kunimi opened his door and let Kindaichi in. He turned on the lights and dropped his things once again. He sat in his usual spot on the couch with Kindaichi next to him.

“S-so what movie?” Kindaichi stuttered

“Up to you really.”

After a bit of argument the two decided to scroll through the movies until Kindaichi said to stop. The movie the cursor ended up on was The Great Gatsby.

Kunimi ran to his bedroom and grabbed a blanket from his bed and a few pillows. He threw all of them at Kindaichi then himself onto the couch. After the pair got into a comfortable sitting position they started up the movie.

“I cannot believe you convinced me to watch this. I swear I haven’t watched this since high school.” Kunimi complained.

“Well I mean we didn’t have to watch it, you just told me to stop at the wrong time. I could change it.”

“Don’t bother, we’re never gonna agree on a stupid movie.”

Kindaichi nodded and paid attention to the screen. Throughout the movie Kindaichi seemed more interested in it rather than Kunimi. Kunimi barely paid attention to it and instead looked at Kindaichi. He was entranced by Kindaichi’s expressions and little mutters he thought he could only hear. Kunimi’s eyes aimlessly wandered down Kindaichi’s face, memorizing every imperfection and blemish. His eyes stopped once they reached his lips. They seemed so soft and warm but Kunimi couldn’t tell. He wanted to see more of Kindaichi and be able to touch him in a way that only friends couldn’t. 

Kunimi’s face heated up at the lustful thoughts in his head and decided to concentrate on the movie. He would sneak a few glances at Kindaichi every once in a while.

“Man Gatsby is so stupid.” Kindaichi frowned.

“How so?”

“He kept throwing parties for a girl who didn’t even love him back, then he DIED.”

“Well you can’t really control love can you?”

“I guess not.”

Kunimi let out a yawn before stretching. “You can borrow some clothes from my closet but you’re not taking my bed.”

“Thanks and I wasn’t planning on sleeping in your room.”

Both got up and headed to Kunimi’s bedroom. Kunimi took grey sweats and a blue shirt and threw them Kindaichi’s way. Both articles of clothing not making it to Kindaichi’s outstretched arms.

“Good aim you got there.” He stated sarcastically.

“Thanks I’ve been practicing.” Kunimi smirked and earned an eye roll from Kindaichi.

Though they hadn’t discussed it, the two silently agreed on having a sleepover. Kunimi didn’t complain as he usually stayed the night at Kindaichi’s place, besides it gave him an excuse to be with Kindaichi for longer.

After a little while of the two getting ready, it was around 10:30pm. It still seemed too early to sleep for their standards. However, the pair had already situated themselves in their respective sleeping area. Kindaichi lay awake on the couch staring at the ceiling. The room was dark and quiet. His eyes glazed over to the t.v. For a second, Kindaichi considered watching something for a bit but instantly dismissed the idea, not wanting to disturb Kunimi. Instead the spikey haired male grabbed his phone from the coffee table in front of the couch and shifted through various social medias before sighing in boredom. 

“Hold on a second..” Kindaichi was suddenly struck with a brilliant-ish idea. 

He went through his bag and pulled out his earphones. He spent a few minutes trying to untangle them then plugged them into his phone. Kindaichi swiftly swiped his phone screen and tapped on his contacts.

Kindaichi decided on calling Hana as she was almost always awake at this hour. He didn’t think to dial anyone but her but that didn’t strike him as strange. To him, she was someone he liked to talk to and someone he wanted to get to know better. 

Kindaichi felt himself get excited when he heard her pick up.

“Hiya.” Hana chimed through the phone.

Kindaichi smiled to himself, “Hi.”

Hana was a nice woman. She was friendly and easily likeable. She was pure and innocent and never had a bad intention, that was something Kindaichi valued. Compared to Kunimi, she was way less blunt and sarcastic which was refreshing to Kindaichi.

The two laughed and talked through the night as they did for the past few nights prior. 

Kunimi, unbeknownst to Kindaichi, was awake watching weird tik toks. His throat seemed to be dry making Kunimi frustrated and uncomfortable. He decided to get up and get water. Kunimi flung the blanket off his legs and carefully exited his room. He made sure not to step on the creaky floorboards as he made his way through the hallway. 

Kunimi got to the end but immediately stopped in his tracks. There were audible laughs from Kindaichi, it was a sound that melted Kunimi’s heart. He peeped his head out the hallway and held the edge of the wall, studying Kindaichi. Kunimi’s eyes widened as he realized Kindaichi was on a call with someone.

Kunimi was never one to eavesdrop but he was curious and jealous. He just wanted to figure out who was making him laugh like that.

Hana.

That girl was back. How many times was he going to get jealous of her? No matter how hard Kunimi tried, for the few moments he knew of Hana he already did not like her. A part of Kunimi wanted to remain a secret from her but something else was telling him to actually meet her and be as passive aggressive to her as possible. That would make him look like an asshole but he really disliked the way Kindaichi looked happier when talking to her than he looked when talking to Kunimi.

This way of thinking was extremely toxic. Him and Kindaichi weren’t even a thing, just friends and that’s it. He had no right to be jealous. That notion made Kunimi feel bad for wanting to be mean to Hana before actually getting to know her.

Kunimi shook his head and stood up straight, continuing his walk to the kitchen. He made sure to make his presence known by making his footsteps a bit louder than they normally would’ve been.

Kindaichi looked up from his phone screen to see Kunimi in the kitchen getting some water. In his head, this would be a perfect time to introduce Kunimi to Hana. With that being his final thought before starting towards Kunimi.

Kunimi placed his empty glass in his sink and was greeted with an overly excited Kindaichi. 

“Why do you look like that?”

Kindaichi unplugged one of his earphones and placed it in Kunimi’s ear. “Say hi.” He said and held the phone with the camera facing Kunimi.

Kunimi gave an unhappy look at Kindaichi before turning to Hana who was smiling warmly at him awaiting his response.

Kunimi sighed and waved, “Hi.”

Hana waved back, “Hey Kunimi, I’ve heard a lot about you from Kindaichi you know?”

“Oh god he talks about me?”

“Yeah all the time actually!”

“What does he sa-”

“Okay we don’t need to know about the things I say about Kunimi.” Kindaichi cut in.

Kunimi kept a cold face as he looked at Kindaichi. Though his heart felt like it was running a marathon. Kunimi never really considered Kindaichi returning the feelings but when he’s told that he actually boasts about Kunimi made him think.

The conversation trailed off into simple talk, much to Kunimi’s disliking. After maybe 20 minutes of talking, Hana ended the call saying that she shouldn’t have kept them up until 3am. 

The boys now sat on the couch together talking about their conversation with Hana. 

Kunimi was frustrated. Hana was actually a very nice person once he spoke to her. She seemed so friendly and likeable which pissed him off because now he has no reason to hate her. This made Kunimi feel exceedingly guilty for being angry with Hana.

Though the more he thought about her, the more insecure he felt. She just seemed like the opposite of Kunimi. Her personality matched Kindaichi's well, far better than his could. Kunimi felt inferior and was met with the inkling that she has more of a chance with Kindaichi than he did. 

His stomach twisted as he thought about Kindaichi with her. Doing things that ‘just friends’ couldn’t do. Kunimi sank in his seat as he pictured Kindaichi with her. How happy he would be if he was with her.

The two fell silent for a while. It wasn’t awkward, just comfortable.

Kunimi stared up at Kindaichi who was smiling and blushing. This made the anxiety in Kunimi skyrocket.

“Do you like her?” Kunimi broke the silence. 

He had to know. Kunimi wanted to know if he needed to be sad or not. He didn’t want to be heartbroken for no reason because that would hinder his writing process.

Kindaichi’s eyes widened at the question. His blush became more visible.

“I-I no she’s just someone I work with who I admire a lot, l-like Oikawa!”

Kunimi turned away from him not completely believing his statement. “Is that so..” His voice sounded melancholic even though he tried to suppress any emotion he was showing.

Kindaichi quickly recovered from his embarrassed episode as he picked up on Kunimi’s shift in tone. It confused him because he didn’t have anything to be sad about.

He placed a hand on Kunimi’s shoulder and tilted his head at him, “You okay?”

Kunimi kept his frown as he removed Kindaichi’s hand and got up. “Just tired..” and with that he returned to his room leaving Kindaichi even more confused.

Kunimi laid in his bed. His head was full of many different thoughts. 

_Kindaichi doesn’t like you he likes Hana_

_You don’t have a shot_

_Maybe he does like you_

_If he can be so close to you than maybe he does_

His thoughts bothered him so much. It was difficult to sleep but eventually he found himself falling into a peaceful slumber.

The days went on the same way. For the next 3 months, the pair worked tirelessly to finish the song for the festival with the assistance of Hana. The festival was scheduled to be held November 20th which was two weeks away.

Kunimi sat alone in the studio. Kindaichi said he was working out the final additions to the song with Hana. They were planning on recording the first take by the end of the week so that the second week they could practice for the festival.

Kunimi stared at the notebook with the lyrics. He had already completed the majority of the words just a few more lines left in the song.

Regardless of his feelings towards Kindaichi and Hana, he pulled through and continued the song. However, throughout the process he noticed them getting closer. It hurt Kunimi to see them flirting and being so near each other. 

Kunimi had always pushed away the idea of them developing feelings for each other but it always stuck around in his mind. The way they acted with each other and the way they spoke about things he wouldn’t understand was painful. They had inside jokes and would apologize to Kunimi because he wouldn’t get it. This made him feel so small and insignificant.

His personality was his final line of defence. He normally acted aloof and cold towards things so no one would expect the pain behind the façade. 

Kunimi just wanted this to be over. The song making and the festival. In Kunimi’s mind, the only reason they got close in the first place was because of this whole song. Maybe once it was over then she would be gone too. Though, Kunimi knew this wasn’t going to happen.

Kindaichi sent pictures of him and Hana working on the song to Kunimi which made his blood boil. He hated the sight and nearly threw his phone across the room. 

After a few hours Hana left Kindaichi’s house. They actually managed to finish the final touches on the song. This relieved Kunimi for a bit.

Kunimi’s phone buzzed in his pocket. The screen lit up to show Kindaichi calling him. He assumed he was just going to ramble about the completion of the song. Kunimi braces himself for the excitement but is met with a different tone.

Kindaichi sounded serious and sincere, it almost terrified Kunimi. 

“Heyo,”Kunimi greeted.

“Hey Kunimi...I um need to tell you something..” His voice trailed off.

Kunimi already didn’t like the confrontational vibe and was afraid for what he was going to say next. 

He stayed silent for a while thinking of possible things Kindaichi could tell him.

_The music file got corrupted_

_I can’t perform_

_I’m so proud of the song_

_I love you_

_…_

_I love her_

“Kunimi?” Kindaichi said through the phone snapping Kunimi out of his thoughts.

“Uh yeah what’s up?”

“I think I...I think I like her.”

In just an instant, Kunimi felt his whole world crumble. His heart broke in his chest as he swallowed hard not knowing how to react. The anxiety that welled up in his stomach made him sick and dizzy.

“Y-you what?”

“Hana..I think I love her..”

“You can’t be serious right?”

“No I am.”

“What am I supposed to do with this knowledge?”

“I dunno support me?”

Kunimi scowled at his phone. 

_HAH support you? How can I support the one I love when you love someone else?_

“Well congrats on finding someone I guess..?”

“Thank you haha..”

“Are you um..g-gonna tell her?”

“I haven’t thought about it yet but I think I will.”

Kunimi felt his eyes tear up. It was all so much to process.

“Okay then g-good luck with that…”

“Kunimi? You sound sad...are you okay?”

“I’m fine...just tired..”

“Go home now, you can finish the song tomorrow. Sleep early today okay?”

“Yeah yeah, I’m going now bye.”

Kunimi didn’t even give Kindaichi a chance to respond before hanging up. 

His eyes stung with tears. Kunimi threw his head in his hands but didn’t let himself cry. It hurt so much. The studio felt like it was spinning at top speed. 

Kunimi wanted to vomit from keeping himself from sobbing. He merely hyperventilated trying not to cry. He was sure someone outside the studio could hear his broken heart pound.

It turns out someone did hear. Kunimi didn’t notice the door click open. He felt warm arms wrap around him. Kunimi rubbed his eyes and looked up at who hugged him. 

“H-H-Hanamaki...?”

“Just be quiet and let me comfort you..”

Hanamaki furrowed his eyebrows and brushed Kunimi’s hair. He whispered “It’s gonna be okay”s and “Don’t worry”s.

After at least half an hour of strained breaths Kunimi pulled away from Hanamaki. 

“It was Kindaichi wasn’t it?” Hanamaki asked, scanning his face.

“W-what?”

“You don’t have to hide the reason you look like that.”

“It w-was..but why do you care?”

“I care because I’m worried about you performing with him..”

“He doesn’t know I like him..”

“You didn’t tell him..”

Kunimi shook his head, “I’ll manage.”

Hanamaki smacked Kunimi’s arm lightly. “Unrequited love hurts you know.”

“I know better than anyone..what do you even know about it?”

“A lot more than you do..”

“Oh really?”

Hanamaki looked out the window at the clear night sky and smiled sadly, “He’s getting married in a few months..”

“What?”

“Matsukawa. He’s getting married to an angel of a woman in January.”

“...”

“At least Kindaichi isn’t permanently gone, Matsukawa will never love me and I know that, but that doesn’t stop me from loving him.”

Kunimi stayed silent.

“Kunimi listen to me..this shit hurts and you shouldn’t be alone while you go through it. I’m here for you cuz I understand. I also know you don’t have a lot of time to recover so let me support you until after the festival.”

Kunimi frowned but nodded silently. He was speechless. Hanamaki had always been acutely aware of the emotions of his peers so it was no surprise that he caught onto Kunimi’s cry of a broken heart.

Hanamaki removed the guitar case from his shoulder and opened it up to reveal a maroon coloured guitar with a carving ‘T.H’ on the bottom. The pink haired male pulled a folded paper from a pocket in the case and placed it on the piano in front of Kunimi.

“I’ll play you a song I wrote about this..it’s uh kinda sad so I’m sorry if it makes this worse. Accompany me wouldja?”

Kunimi sniffled before adjusting the paper and looking down at the keys. For this song, Hanamaki stood up and leaned against the piano, just barely resting his bottom on it.

With that, a soft and somber tune began to be strummed on the guitar. Kunimi began playing the notes in front of him making the overall song sound even more melancholic than with the guitar alone.

Hanamaki took a deep breath before beginning to sing.

_Turn down the lights_

_Turn down the bed_

_Turn down these voices inside my head_

_Lay down with me_

_Tell me no lies_

_Just hold me close, don't patronize_

_Don't patronize me_

Kunimi glanced at Hanamaki who oddly enough was smiling while he sang. It almost vexed Kunimi that Hanamaki was so sad yet he was smiling.

_Cause I can't make you love me if you don't_

_You can't make your heart feel something it won't_

_Here in the dark, in these final hours_

_I will lay down my heart and I'll feel the power_

_But you won't, no you won't_

_'Cause I can't make you love me, if you don't_

Kunimi saw Hanamaki shut his eyes briefly, probably to push back the tears that dared to fall from his eyes.

_I'll close my eyes, then I won't see_

_The love you don't feel when you're holding me_

_Morning will come and I'll do what's right_

_Just give me till then to give up this fight_

_And I will give up this fight_

_'Cause I can't make you love me if you don't_

_You can't make your heart feel something it won't_

_Here in the dark, in these final hours_

_I will lay down my heart and I'll feel the power_

_But you won't, no you won't_

_'Cause I can't make you love me, if you don't_

The song hurt to play but it hurt even more to hear Hanamaki sing along to it. The lyrics and notes were traced with depression and longing and his voice was piercingly sad.

The words resonated with Kunimi after they had stopped playing. Somehow playing this song had calmed Kunimi down enough to get him thinking more rationally than before. He was going to finish the performance for Hanamaki and for Kindaichi, not for himself. If he had the choice he would’ve quit the project but there were two people he had to carry on for. 

From that day Kunimi had been waiting for Kindaichi to tell him out of nowhere that he confessed to Hana. It never happened though.

Kunimi began talking to Kindaichi less and more to Hanamaki. As much as it hurt to not talk to Kindaichi as much, he knew it would hurt more to constantly be seeing Kindaichi pining Hana. 

Finally it was the night before the festival. Kunimi’s heartbroken anxiety was mixed with his performance anxiety. He didn’t have his main support anymore and was afraid of everything happening. Kunimi’s anxiety got so severe that Hanamaki took him to a doctor and got him prescribed medication for it as he refused to go to therapy.

Kunimi probably downed too many xanax to cope with the anxiety that night. It hurt to think and he needed an escape. At least he didn’t have to perform alone right? Kunimi wasn’t singing either so he shouldn’t have been as anxious as he was.

Maybe it was because he was performing a song he wrote and was afraid of everyone’s opinions on it, or maybe it was because he was afraid of all the emotion that could be drawn out during the performance. 

The different ideas rang through Kunimi’s mind for a while before Kunimi drew a blank and fell asleep.

Kunimi awoke from his sleep by his annoyingly loud alarm. He slapped his hand onto his phone to turn it off and sluggishly got up from bed. 

Kunimi did his normal morning routine, still feeling the building dread in his stomach. Kunimi hadn’t seen Kindaichi in a while only on video chats or voice calls, not in real life so often as before.

According to Hanamaki that was part of the ‘healing process’, it was a process Kunimi really didn’t believe in but he trusted his upperclassman.

Kunimi’s eyes fell onto the outfit he planned on wearing to the event. As said by Iwaizumi and Oikawa, all Seijoh members were required to wear some shade of blue much to Kunimi’s taste.

Kunimi wore a white turtleneck, with an opened blue button up shirt, black jeans. He decided to tuck in his turtleneck and get on with it.

Once he finished getting ready, he dialed Kindaichi’s number.

“Hiya, you ready for the big day?” He heard Kindaichi ask enthusiastically.

“No, are you?”

“Don’t be like that before our performance! I’m really excited to finally be able to perform this song with you.”

“I guess I am too..”

“I might be late though cuz I’m picking up Hana. Do you have a ride, cuz if you don’t you can come with us.”

Kunimi remained silent for a minute before speaking up again, “No it’s okay I’m going with Hanamaki.”

“Ahh got it got it. I’m gonna finish getting ready then I’m gonna leave for Hana’s place, see you there!”

“Yeah see you..”

The call ended leaving Kunimi still wallowing in the emptiness. He shook it off and left his apartment building. Kunimi walked to the front and saw Hanamaki waving from inside the silver car.

Kunimi kept a straight face and headed inside the vehicle.

“Kunimi you look pale, take a deep breath dude..”

“I am normally like this shut up.”

Hanamaki chuckled and faced the road. The drive was around 1 hour since it was just out of the city.

Kunimi fell asleep on the car ride. He wasn’t tired at all, he just wanted peace from his raging thoughts.

When he woke up he looked outside the window at all the booths and decorations. Hanamaki parked the car and stretched once he got out. Kunimi did the same then waltzed over to his upperclassman.

“You can stay with me since Kindaichi isn’t here yet.”

Kunimi’s posture deflated slightly, sad that he wasn’t going to be with Kindaichi for the majority of the time. 

Hanamaki sighed after seeing Kunimi’s reaction, “Hey come on I’m just as good of a buddy as Kindaichi is. Let’s enjoy our time here for now okay?”

Kunimi kept the scowl on his face but followed Hanamaki’s request.

It was still pretty early so the two asked around if they could assist with setting up to which they were declined.

“Man, maybe we should’ve come later.” Hanamaki scratched his head.

“We could sit on those picnic tables over there..”Kunimi suggested and pointed to the park area with food stands surrounding the area.

Hanamaki smiled lazily at him, “Yeah and we could get some food too.”

Kunimi nodded and took off after Hanamaki.

Kunimi was scheduled to perform around 7pm which was nearly 6 hours later. At least it gave Kunimi enough time to prepare for it. 

The day went on normally, Kunimi and Hanamaki messing around with the activities they offered. However, Kunimi would check around him or glance at the parking lot to check if Kindaichi arrived but he never did.

It was around 5pm when Kindaichi actually came to the area with Hana. 

She was star struck at the different things on display. Hana took Kindaichi’s arm and dragged him around. They played games together and tried the snacks there.

Kindaichi felt his heart skip a beat when he saw Hana smile. He wanted to see that smile more and more and wanted to be the reason she smiled in the first place. Kindaichi blushed now realizing the closeness of Hana to him.

Kindaichi shook her off his arm and intertwined his fingers with hers. They were far smaller than his which made him blush a brighter red.

Kunimi sat backstage listening to Kyoutani, Yahaba and Watari finish a song and the crowd went crazy. The third years had already performed before them and it was Kindaichi and Kunimi last. 

Kunimi tapped his foot nervously, not seeing Kindaichi yet. Hanamaki took a seat beside him and placed a hand on his shoulder reassuringly. 

“Hey hey breathe Kunimi.”

“He’s not here, what do I do?” 

“Let’s just be patient, Yahaba and the others aren’t done yet.”

“2 songs is enough time for me to find Kindaichi right?”

“I guess?”

“Then I’m looking for him.”

Kunimi didn’t hesitate and shot up. He didn’t care if Hanamaki was left behind. All Kunimi wanted was to find Kindaichi so he wouldn’t be alone to perform.

His footsteps picked up speed as he ran through different rows of booths. He pushed past people not caring if they were angry with him for being rude. 

Kunimi’s attention was drawn to the performers. They were on their second last song meaning he didn’t have much time to find him. He shook his head still determined to find them.

“God think Akira, where would Kindaichi be?” He muttered to himself.

He immediately thought of food. Kindaichi liked grilled corn so he would probably be at the stand serving that. Unfortunately, Kindaichi wasn’t there and Yahaba’s group was already halfway through their song.

Kunimi began running again. He was with Hana and he would probably be doing some cliche thing with her.

“Those animal keychains.” Kunimi raced toward the booth with a minigame that if you won you were rewarded with little plush animal keychains.

He wasn’t there. In defeat Kunimi began walking away but stopped when he heard a familiar voice. He crept over to where he heard the voice and felt his stomach drop.

Kindaichi sat on a haybale next to Hana. The sunset made the scenery beautiful except for the distasteful sight before Kunimi. Hana had her arms around his neck and Kindaichi had his on her waist. They were kissing. The couple were too lost in each other to notice Kunimi.

Kunimi felt his knees go weak as he walked away. He felt like crying but he held back since he was in public. His hearing blurred out for a bit only hearing his aching heart beat weakly in his chest.

He felt so numb.

Kunimi walked up the stairs to the stage. Hanamaki ran to him and looked at him confused.

“What happened?”

“I’m performing alone.”

“You’re what?”

“I’m singing alone.”

“What about Kindaichi?”

“What about him?” Kunimi shot at Hanamaki, his words laced with malice.

Hanamaki knew something had happened but he decided not to press for an explanation.

The previous group exited the stage with happy smiles the complete opposite to what Kunimi was doing.

“Let’s give a big hand to the Seijoh second years everyone!” Oikawa shouted excitedly.

“Now let’s welcome our two newest members Kindaichi and Kunimi!” Iwaizumi said with forced enthusiasm.

Hanamaki quickly ran on stage and stole the mic from Oikawa.

He smiled nervously at the crowd, “A-actually Kunimi will be the only one performing, Kindaichi had important business to attend and couldn’t make it to the performance.”

Oikawa and Iwaizumi looked at each other in shock then back to Hanamaki.

Iwaizumi spoke up, “Sorry about that guys, but introducing Kunimi Akira who will be performing his original song Fools!” 

The trio left the stage as the curtains pulled back. The curtains revealed Kunimi sitting on a shiny black piano with a mic bent towards him. Kunimi took one quick look at the crowd then back to the piano.

With a deep breath, he began to play the introduction.

  
  


_I am tired of this place, I hope people change_

_I need time to replace what I gave away_

_And my hopes, they are high, I must keep them small_

_Though I try to resist I still want it all_

When the electronic portion of the music picked up, Kunimi removed the mic from the stand and got out of his seat and approached the front of the stage.

_I see swimming pools and living rooms and aeroplanes_

_I see a little house on the hill and children's names_

_I see quiet nights poured over ice and Tanqueray_

_But everything is shattering and it's my mistake_

Kunimi allowed himself to express his emotion during the song. He found that there was no point hiding how he felt when singing a song about Kindaichi.

_Only fools fall for you, only fools_

_Only fools do what I do, only fools fall_

_Only fools fall for you, only fools_

_Only fools do what I do, only fools fall_

Kunimi brushed hair out of his face and took a breath waiting for his que to sing again. The anxiety was replaced with anger and spite. He performed the song he wrote with Kindaichi and he wasn’t even here to perform with him. Not even in the crowd watching. He was off fooling around with his new girlfriend. Kunimi hated hating Kindaichi for doing this to him but what could he do now?

_Oh, our lives don't collide, I'm aware of this_

_The differences and impulses and your obsession with_

_The little things you like stick, and I like aerosol_

_Don't give a fuck, not giving up, I still want it all_

Kunimi felt the hatred rise in his body. He began feeling guilty for the resentment he felt. Though the pain of Kindaichi loving someone else began to cloud his mind. The idea of someone else’s hands on him infuriated him. Kindaichi would smile because of her and Kunimi could only watch and be happy for them.

_Only fools fall for you, only fools_

_Only fools do what I do, only fools fall_

_Only fools fall for you, only fools_

_Only fools do what I do, only fools fall_

Kunimi felt his heart break knowing that the perfect future he envisioned with Kindaichi was no more. All it was, was a daydream. Something that was so in reach but now Kunimi would never achieve. Kindaichi had someone else to have that happy ending with. He was the main character, Kunimi was the best friend not the love interest. Kunimi felt his eyes sting as he continued the song.

_I see swimming pools and living rooms and aeroplanes_

_I see a little house on the hill and children's names_

_I see quiet nights part over ice and Tanqueray_

_But everything is shattering and it's my mistake_

Kunimi began to cry. It was his fault for not saying anything. It was his fault for realizing his feelings too late. It was his fault for falling in love with him.

Kunimi was a fool for falling for Kindaichi and he finally realized that now. Kindaichi didn’t love him and now he wasn’t blinded by the unrealistic future he yearned for. All those years he spent suppressing a strong feeling and only now letting it surface. Kunimi became aware of his insanity as soon as that Hana girl came into the picture. 

He regretted not telling Kindaichi but there was no point even if he did. Hana stole his heart before they both knew it.

_Only fools fall for you, only fools fall_

_Only fools do what I do, only fools fall_

_Only fools fall for you, only fools fall_

_Only fools do what I do, only fools fall_

The tears didn’t stop. They kept falling. Kunimi didn’t care, why should he? His heart hurt deeply as his voice rang around the area. He gazed at the crowd that seemed so moved by him. His eyes looked at the other Seijoh members whose mouths were all agape. None of them would’ve expected Kunimi to show emotion like this, in front of a crowd nonetheless.

_Only fools fall for you (only fools)_

_Only fools do what I do (only fools)_

_Only fools fall for you (only fools)_

_Only fools do what I do, only fools fall_

Kunimi finished the song and bowed his head. The crowd erupted in applause and cries. He wasn’t expecting to express that much emotion in his song. 

He watched the curtains close before walking off the stage. Kunimi took his sleeve and wiped the remaining tears from his eyes. 

Hanamaki was the first to run to Kunimi’s side. He instantly wrapped his arms around him and embraced him.

“You cried..”

Kunimi didn’t respond. He gripped Hanamaki’s shirt tighter. Suddenly in a big rush of emotion he felt himself shrivel in Hanamaki’s arms.

With Kunimi still in his arms he began to guide him back to his car. Hanamaki made sure to make each step carefully so Kunimi wouldn’t stumble while walking backwards.

Hanamaki opened the front door for Kunimi and helped him sit. Before Kunimi could shut the door he heard someone grab the handle of the car door.

“Kunimi!” Kindaichi shouted, “You’re crying? What happened during the performance?”

Hanamaki opened his mouth to say something before Kunimi spoke up, “Why should you care? You didn’t care to show up so why do you give a fuck about me now?”

Hanamaki stood behind Kindaichi awkwardly not knowing how to properly defuse the situation. 

Kunimi shoved Kindaichi with one hand and shut the door in front of him. He shot a glare his way before sinking into his seat. “The performance went well.” Kunimi said sarcastically.

Hanamaki took this as a signal to get in the car and leave. Before Kunimi or Kindaichi could continue the argument he waved his hand, “Sorry Kindaichi, we’re on our way back now. We’ll see you tomorrow okay?” 

Kindaichi stood back unsure of Kunimi’s point of view.

Hanamaki quickly pulled out his phone and texted his chat with the other third years.

**Makki: im taking kunimi back he needs to emotionally recover**

**Oikawa✨: is he alright?**

**Makki: well not rlly but i can take care of it**

**Iwaizumiez: Alright take care of him**

**Wattsun: Our act is done so ur good**

**Makki: yeah yeah**

**Oikawa✨: be safe guys we’ll see u tmrw**

Hanamaki set his phone in the cupholder next to him and pulled out of the driveway. He cursed at himself for choosing such a tight parking space but successfully left without getting into an accident. The ride back to the city was quiet as expected.

Hanamaki knew this was not an easy thing to cope with and wished the best for Kunimi. Though from experience, he knew Kunimi wasn’t going to be okay for a while. To this he willingly volunteered to be Kunimi’s person so he wasn’t alone.

That was how it was for a long time. Hanamaki made sure to check up on Kunimi when he could and left him alone when asked. Gradually, he encouraged the younger of the two to go out and breathe the fresh air.

It had been a few months since the festival and Kunimi was recovering well. It was a late night in the second week of April. Kunimi was back to semi functional again but still healing. 

Him and Kindaichi lost all contact for those few months. Kunimi wasn’t the only one affected by the silence. Kindaichi on the other end, spent countless sleepless nights wondering what happened between them. He was dense and obviously wasn’t aware of Kunimi’s preexistent feelings while he was with Hana.

His confusion ended up taking a toll on his relationship with Hana. There were a myriad of arguments between the couple.

“Why do you care so much about his feelings?” Hana would shout.

“He’s my closest friend and it’s been months since we last spoke!” Kindaichi would fire back.

“Why do you need him if you have me?”

“I don’t only need you, you know?!”

“Then you won’t have me..”

The two had their final dispute only a few months after they got together. It couldn’t be helped since the falling out of him and Kunimi’s friendship haunted Kindaichi.

It ate away at his mind for so long until he couldn’t stand it anymore. He just had to know what happened to them. Why did Kunimi just suddenly hate him? 

On this particular night Kindaichi listened to the recording he and Kunimi did before they stopped talking. He didn’t mean to listen to it but since he was clearing out his laptop’s files he ended up coming across it again. 

The different components of the song reminded him of the gruelling process they went through to finish it. Kindaichi became emotional realizing that they hadn’t bickered or communicated since then. Throughout the song he tried to think of when and where he went wrong.

_Not being there for the performance?_

_Not helping him with writing?_

Nothing seemed to add up. This discouraged Kindaichi. He scratched his head thinking of the different possibilities but drew a blank. 

He hated not understanding Kunimi. Usually he would be able to know in an instant what was wrong with Kunimi but currently he wasn’t even able to come up with anything reasonable. Perhaps his time with Hana dulled his ‘Kunimi senses’. 

Kindaichi was fed up with being left in the dark and thought the only reasonable thing to do was ask Kunimi what exactly went wrong. Kindaichi opened his phone to check the time.

‘1:46am’ it read. This didn’t change Kindaichi’s mind to go over to Kunimi’s apartment, after all it was just a few blocks down from his house.

Without another thought, he left his house.

Kunimi sat at his PC playing on a Minecraft server with Kageyama. Kunimi and Kageyama made amends after their past history but they were only acquaintances that played Minecraft together.

A firm knock at the door surprised Kunimi. He raised an eyebrow at who could be knocking at his door at nearly 2 in the morning. Kunimi assumed it was just Hanamaki.

**[Akimi]: i'm gonna leave someone’s knocking at my door**

**[Milkboi]: wtf at this hour?**

**[Akimi]: yeah ik i think it’s hanamaki checking up on me again**

**[Milkboi]: ahh okok see ya then**

**[Akimi]: yeah**

Kunimi closed the tab and shut off his computer. He got out of his chair and left his room to answer the door.

Kunimi twisted the handle but didn’t look up, “Hanamaki if you’re here to give me groceries I actually went shopping a few days ago so I’m good.”

“What?”

Kunimi looked up completely shocked to not see his pink haired upperclassman. His social anxious reflex kicked in and Kunimi shut the door on Kindaichi.

“Hey what the hell man I just wanna talk.” Kindaichi’s voice was audible but muffled and Kunimi could sense the annoyance.

Kunimi opened the door reluctantly and had an unamused look on his face. “What do you want?”

“Can I come in-”

“No.”

“I-ok. Well I came to ask you something.”

“Make it quick I was in the middle of something important.”

“Y-yeah..well I just wanted to know why we stopped talking.”

Kunimi scoffed, “Really? That’s what you’re asking?”

Kindaichi nodded sheepishly. “It was just so abrupt and I was so confused for a long time because I didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Are you saying leaving me to perform OUR song alone wasn’t wrong?”

“Okay that was pretty shitty of me-”

“You left me alone there for her. Do you understand how disrespectful that was?”

“I understand that and I’m sorry-”

“Sorry isn’t going to change anything. You realize you were the reason I cried that day.”

“Just cuz I didn’t show up to the performance? That’s pretty lame.”

“That’s not the full reason I broke down you idiot.”

“Then what’s the full reason huh?”

Kunimi bit his lip and looked away from Kindaichi. It wasn’t something he was ready to tell him. In fact he was probably never going to be ready to tell him. What was the worst that could happen if he told him? They already lost touch with each other and Kindaichi did have a girlfriend. The worst had already happened. 

Kunimi looked back to Kindaichi and frowned. “You left me on that stage for her.”

“That’s the same thing you said earlier-”

“I’m not done. You love her right?”

“Well not anymore we kinda split.”

Kunimi had a shocked expression on his face but recovered quickly. 

“I’m sorry.”

“All good so uh can I know now?”

“Y-you loved her and...not me..”Kunimi’s voice trailed off.

“Huh?”

Kunimi opened the door more and let Kindaichi into his apartment. Kunimi sat on his couch with Kindaichi sitting on the other end away from him.

“I had a crush on you..”

Kindaichi was taken aback by what Kunimi had said. Was this why he seemed more on edge around Hana. The lyrics of the song rang in Kindaichi’s ears as he finally understood why Kunimi wrote what he wrote.

It was like all the puzzle pieces fit together in Kindaichi’s head. His gaze shifted to Kunimi who was curled up on the other side of the couch.

“For how long?”

“Since high school I guess..but I only realized it recently..”

Kindaichi frowned. He felt the guilt and shame rise in him. How could he have not noticed for so long. He was the reason Kunimi was hurting for so long and only made it worse.

Kindaichi felt sick to his stomach after the fact.

“I-I’m so sorry Akira..”

“Don’t say my first name. I don’t wanna hear it from you..”

“I didn’t know I’m sorry..Kunimi”

“You’re just an idiot, but that doesn’t matter now..”

Kindaichi began to weep. He felt so sorry for being the reason he drifted away from his best friend. He regretted ever falling for Hana and wished he had focused on the song more than her.

Kunimi’s expression softened when he saw Kindaichi’s miserable figure. He scooted over to him and placed a hand on his back, rubbing circles reassuringly.

“Why didn’t I notice..?”

“No one would’ve ever guessed especially when it’s me.”

“I’m sorry..”

“It’s fine.”

“Can we be the way we were before?”

“That’s a really stupid thing to ask. We can’t be the way we were before. You’re honestly crazy to think we can just forget all that happened..I’m sorry Kindaichi.”

“We could try.”

“No we can’t. We’re too broken and messed up to be like that again.”

“...”

Kunimi sighed sadly, “I still love you and I can’t help it. It’s like I’m infected with an incurable disease.”

“We can date then..”

“You can’t force yourself to feel something you don’t.”

“Then what can we do?”

“Nothing.”

Kunimi wrapped both arms around Kindaichi and felt himself begin to cry as well.

“I hate you..”

“I know..”

“Let’s stay friends...I can’t lose you.”

“I never wanted to lose you in the first place.”

Kindaichi put his arms around Kunimi and cried with him. The two were reunited with their broken hearts beating in sync once more. It was almost like nothing changed but when you really looked at it they were just fools in love with the wrong people.


End file.
